Welcome to better today with your host Shawn Maguire and with over 25 years of counseling experience, this is the Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast. It inspires you to create both an amazing family and marriage. This is the Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast that helps you to navigate the challenges of modern life. In this Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast, you will be given the same tools, techniques, and stories that Sean and his team have used to help thousands of people to transform their lives. If you’re ready to make real progress, that will change your marriage, your family, and your life. Then get ready because better today starts. Now
what celebrates Sean? So we’ll so Shawn, let’s do it. How are Ya doing? Good. Over here. I’m being influenced as the influencer influenced by Mr Sleepy. Now notice this is the first time you came over without a coffee. Yes. First Time. Exactly. I don’t know what I’m going to do with my life. I’m just say a little bit, you know, I know you were in a youth camp all week. Yes. Oh, it was really fun. Really Fun. But I didn’t know your energy. Just go through the wayside. You have kids that have all this energy there live just happening. Teenagers. Yeah. Screenagers yeah. I would not exchange it for the world though. It was so fun. You know my daughter went out one of the last days. Yeah.
She said, I said, Babe. I said, here’s the deal. What they do there is they push the limits of how far you’ll go with God. They take the stuff they talk about in church and the box called the building and then they take it out on the streets preach. And she said, dad, you know how you always asking me when we’re out in public, hey, you think we should pray for that person and that person? Yeah. She’s like, I went up and asked five
wow. Five people for prayer. That’s five lives that were impacted. Rather they know it or not. Yeah. In Penn square she said in the mall. Yeah.
Nobody’s thinking about how cool they look, what they need to wear. Sure. Smell. Wow. She went out and she was challenged to ask people that were strangers. Wow. Now she did it in a group. So it was safe. Yeah. People around, but I just thought it was great that she did take that step out. That’s it. That’ll be our next Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast series after this is about dealing with anxiety. Yeah. We’ll talk about how she dealt with that.
Exactly. Love it. Could you imagine, you know, going to the store, going to the mall, looking for clothes, and then coming across someone who’s clothing, kindness. Hey Mike, your daughter rightfully. Yeah, that would make my day because I’m not asking you for, it can be a harsh world. Yeah. We all need, we all need it, man. We need prayer. You need prayer for the sleepy man, man. Exactly. Heisman old football days.
We are finishing up either in this Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast or the next one, the seven proven strategies to walk out your dreams. Seven proven strategies to walk out your dreams. So guys, if you have not listened to the previous two Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcasts over, it goes over the first three. We’re going to do four, five, six and seven and seven. Let’s do it two more. So number four, you think we should review a little bit. Give him a little review.
Yeah. Let’s go back a little bit and just go over a couple few things that we went over before. Number four,
the first one is vision. You’ve got to have a vision that’s compelling enough to move you to action consistently. Do you remember the second one? Number two is that we must have reasons. Reason. What is your why behind accomplishing this dream? It’s gotta be compelling enough to get you through the adversity. Wow. Do you know number three? Number three is we have to review it, review, review, review, and feel it. Fill it every single day. Which brings us to number four. What’s number four? Your standard ways, your standard. You know, we live in America where the standard seemingly has declined. Wow. Generation, various standard of living for God’s standard of pastors and preachers, not using profanity and church standard of letting our words speak life. Yeah. And looking different than the world. True call. We’re the ones that are called out to be separated, to be joy, to be happiness, to be power, perseverance, faithfulness, raise your standard. Yeah.
And another thing is, even in our dress, our wear, uh, I think of me and my wife were talking about modesty. It’s like, it’s a, it’s not even a policy anymore. Uh, in our culture in our day and age.
Yeah. You’re, you know, when my daughter looks for shorts, she simply cannot find shorts that are reasonable length unless their boy shorts [inaudible] boys basketball shorts. But any shorts for girls, you look, it’s right above there. It’s right below their bump read. It is, it’s, it’s ridiculous. It’s where are we man? It’ll, that’s why we’re raising the standard of how we can live our lives to accomplish our dreams. And you move it from something that, that you should do to something that you must do. Got It. There’s different ways to see this, but in our, what we’re going to talk about today is if you say, you know, I should get up early, I should do this. I should do that. Well then you’re living a life of autotune. You’re living a life of guilt. A life of shame. Yeah. Because you’re constantly thinking about things you should do.
But if you say, you know, I must get up early so that I can spend time with God, I must do this. I must, yeah, and you raise it from, I’m good at, like for example, if I say I’m going to go on an eating plan, like the whole 30 [inaudible] and I say, well, I probably shouldn’t have that. Or maybe I won’t have that. Well, if I tell you to a must or I don’t do that. Yeah. Or I, I don’t, I only eat kale. I only eat gluten free. I only eat that food, which feeds my body health. Yeah. Any nourishment? True changes from a should or a maybe to like, I must have, you must do something. Sure. We’ll do something.
Yeah. That’s really good. Yeah. If you must do something, you will do, you will do it. Yeah.
Like I feel like I must lead by example. Yeah. So when I fall, I get back up in my mind and I have my kids looking at me, my wife, and they’re just, and other people look at me too. But those are the ones that I know I need to lead. Well yeah, my state or it has to be higher. So none of us can do this perfectly, but we can make progress or progress.
I love that Sean. And just another way of looking at it as an attitude thing that I’ve been focusing on throughout the last, you know, a couple years of my life is when I wake up in the morning, not saying I have to do something, but that I get to do something. It’s a privilege to be alive and well and be able to do these different things, which is lead in love well to please God please friends.
That’s right. So while you’re keying in on is we have to choose our language well, so I, I find that each person has to find me a language that works for them. We use the same thing. You don’t have to do this, I get to do this, but in your mind if you have a mussed over a, maybe you’re going to accomplish them. But like I must look, you know, I must do these things. I must get out of bed to be successful in life. I must mow my lawn if I don’t want all these bugs, snakes to get into me, Paul. But you know, I also think it’s great to have language like I get to, I get to, I get to,
yeah, that’s a good attitude.
But if you, if you see yourself as a certain way, then it changes the way you live your life. Wow. You know, I had a dad that I’ve never met till I never met him really, but I never knew who it was until last year. I know you know this. Yes. And I always had it in my heart. I must be this kind of debt and my, my framework was God and Jesus. How I modeled myself after that’s really good are certain things I got. But I said I must leave a better legacy than my father did for me. Cause I never knew him. I must live for God. I met and now that I had to, but that, that’s who I’ve called to be. Like, it’s not an option. Like I, I will do this. You know, the one of the explorers when he came over, he, uh, he said, we’re not going to have an option to go back. We’re going to have two options. We either survive or we die. And he burned all the ships. Wow. That’s the point. Whether you use the word MOUs, whether you use the word I get to, whether you use the phrase, this is who I am, which is the next what we’re going to jump into with identity. That’s good. It changes the way that you see and it changes the way that you live out your dreams.
Wow. This solid. So good. If you guys just take a moment, just think about it. What are you focusing on? The more you focus on who god is and what he’s like will determine your, how, your attitude and your thinking. And that’s what, that’s what a change you, your attitude, your thinking.
That’s right. You know, your wants, they don’t get accomplished, but your must do. You know, I want to learn how to play this. I want to know how to play the guitar, but I won’t take lessons. Ah, I want to know all about how to do, I can do the computer efficiently, but I hate it. So I won’t
it. But these are all wants. What makes you hate it? The learning part or just the overall complexity of it. The complexity of got, there’s so many other areas of life that I value with people learning new material to change lives. Then when I get into the minutia of computers, AH, true. But I like, see, here’s the thing about, we’ve been an influence through nationals while you’re the counselor on the influencer. Yeah. Because like as a counselor, you’re in the nitty gritty, you’re rs holding norms with people like in the, you know, in the physical, like really cool. And I spend a lot of time personally in the digital space, online connecting, uh, with, you know, you know, people all over the world and things like that. But what’s cool about is that God wired us a bit different, but in the same way, the mission and the like-mindedness attitude is the same. Like we both are missional while we’re doing, even though we can have our differences on how we beat the eighth amen. Whoa. Shah influencer in counselor. So think about it in your life. Where did
do you, where do you guys need to raise the standard in your life? Do you drink too much? Do you do too much CBD with THC, that’s a big thing.
Wow, that’s a real big deal out here. A store on every corner. Every corner. It’s like Ma, it’s more popular than McDonald’s. Yeah, it is more popular. There’s way more than McDonald’s. Wow. Crazy. Crazy.
So I think, what else do you need to raise your standard in parenting? Do you need to raise your standard in the way that you approach God or the time that you make for God? Wow. Where in your life do you do? What about your career career? Is there a standard that you need to raise? Because if there is, we’re going to go through some steps below that will really help you get there. And again, if you haven’t listened to the previous Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast, please do
go check it out now. Like, not out now, but you know now, right after this one, consumers stop, go, stop. Don’t just keep going.
So the fifth one is identity identity. Now you know what that means. How do I identify myself? So start identifying yourself in a new way. When you’re, when you are not saved and you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you take on a new identity. You know the second Corinthians five 17 says, the old is gone. The newest kind of, you’re a new creation in Christ. And so this is where you commit to living out of your new identity. You say the old man is dead. I don’t, I don’t want to live out of a new identity. I must. I will. I will. I will. I am a new creation. Wow. You change your language to fit where you’re going, not where you’ve been. That’s really good. Say that again. Language to go to, to fit where you’re going, not where you’ve been. So think about areas in your life that you need to identify yourself differently. Because we live out who we believe are, we certainly live out, we live out. Who we believe we are. So think about, think about you or Shawn, how do you live this out? What’s your identity?
So the way I live it out, the real way is that I can’t live off how I feel I am are how I think I am. I have to line it up to God’s word and I have to align my, my, my identity to his scripture, his truth, that which should be my truth. What I believe when I walk in a and it changes me, it changes the way I view God in a Yay changes everything.
So if you have a low self esteem and a low self value that’s going to reflect in all of your relationships with God is going to reflect in your relationship, your family, your friends. And if you’re wanting to date or married, it’s going to affect everything. It’s going to affect the kind of people that you’re attracted to that are attracted you. I don’t mean just romantically, I mean in friendships, in business relationships with employees, employers, it’s going to affect every area of your life. Your identity sets the standard of the kind of life that you will live. Your identity sets the standard of the kind of life that you will live. Wow. And if you think about it, you’ll never exceed your identity, not over a long period of time. So for example, if you see yourself as somebody who’s at $50,000 a year income earner, then you can make 60 you can make 75 but unless your identity changes, you’ll start sleeping in more. You won’t do what got you there in the first place because you’ve got to, you’ve got to come back down cause your identity says you’re a 50,000 now the other side is if you start making 35 35,000 well then you’re going to find ways to get back up around 50 turn. That’s kind of how we do life.
It’s crazy. We like fluctuate off. You know, how we feel like we’re, are we determined who we are by, you know, the content in our bank account or what we have or what we don’t have. But we got to do, do it by WHO’s we are. And what he says about us and yeah, that’s what Shane’s my life, man. That’s really what’s changed my life throughout the course of the years is coming back to the reality of who I truly am in God.
It’s so many times we allow these limits, which is what people say about us from our past to really affect the way that we start living in our present. And that will create the future. So if we continue to live out of the past identity of who we been even in, even if you’ve been a Christian and 50 and you’re, you got saved when you were six, you’ll still go back and live out of those same belief systems. So wow. The goal is to remove those belief systems and allow the Holy Spirit to give you a new identity framed with the Bible and scripture who God says you are progressively stepping into that new identity where you make decisions based on love, based on faith, not based on fear and anxiety and the rejection that you’ve experienced in the past or the year of experiencing again in the future. Wow. The entity identity identity.
So that emotional baggage of your past will keep you in spiritual bondage wherever you are. And we have to come to God and say, God, I need help, Lord. Pour out your truth on me, into my heart. My Dad’s messed up. Dirty pass doesn’t take away from your love. From who? From for me and for who I am called to be. So lean into that and ask God to change your heart, to change the way you think even about yourself and what you think about the world. And uh, yeah, like Christ reign and ruling your heart. Today
I met our fish in that new version, counseling that live. We have a [inaudible] to help people discover what better looks like for them and then equipped them with the tools to create it. And we do that out of seven core values. Now these seven core values really were birthed out of what God has done in my life. And I really took months really to to determine what they would be. God. I think we all need to have core values identifying that we live our lives by, because the reality is we all have core values. There’s no doubt we all have core values. I just think most of us are living life, having not identified them. What’s over your core values may not be serving the purposes of God in your life. It may be serving the purposes of hell and you may be living unaware.
So I’m going to go over some of mine, cut it because I don’t want anybody to be like the elephant. You know when an elephant is young and they have these elephants in the circus or wherever they’re trained, they would take a wooden stake and they would stake in the ground and put a rope around the elephant’s neck and as the yellow thing aged. But you know when they’re young, the elephant couldn’t put that stake out of the ground. They couldn’t pull it out of the ground. They tried, they fought, but they couldn’t. Why is the elephant h that stake became so minuscule and small, but it still held the elephant captive. Because when the elephant was young, it learned that I could not overcome this, that it was stronger than me. And that’s what happens to so many of us, that we live life out of the past limitations that we have when we were kids.
It’s crazy not have the power you serve the authority of those over us that may not have been godly. We didn’t have the wherewithal in our mind or with our skillset to make different decisions, to get away from people that were bullies. To get out of this situation where maybe you were forced to be in a math situation and maybe you’re not a math person and God said, no, I want you to be creative. You’re a social influencer, not a math guy, but you were judged on that so you feel stupid even though you’re a genius in another area that God’s called you to. Yeah, so don’t, I’m going to give you these values that we’ve shared that will help you really move away from the limitations of the past. Don’t be able to baby elephant. Don’t be an adult elephant. Be Your own kind of beautiful and God. That’s good. So these seven core values, if you’re watching on youtube or Facebook, I’m going to show them to you real quick.
Really, the best thing to do is to go to our website, [inaudible] dot live and go to the about us page. These will be listed right there about us core values. The first one is faith. We believe though this is for our Christian counseling practice where we change lives and see God move on a daily basis. We believe that faith expresses itself in action and we share our faith through the work that we do and it grows on. There’s more. I’m going to just read the first part of each one. Okay. The third is the second is enthusiasm. Where you’re bringing excitement filled with hope to those we love and those we serve teamwork. We work together to unleash the potential of every person to achieve extraordinary results for growth. When you’re intentional about continually growing into the next best versions of ourselves. We are on a quest to learn and to surround ourself with incredible people and resources to become the amazing person.
God destined us to be good. That’s really good excellence. We always bring our best excellence, honors, God and those we serve six integrity. We do the right thing according to God’s word, according to God’s word, period. Seven is coachable. We believe honest feedback creates a culture of continuous growth where everyone wins. Honest feedback is our love language and we don’t just want to be loved. We don’t just want to be coached. We seek it out. It’s really seek it out, seek it out. I think if you guys take some time and really identify the core values of your life that you are living out of, those are just the ones that we came up with. Some people have like 50 core values, which I think is overkill. He goes, no, not many of us are going to be able to memorize and keep all of heart.
Yeah. So to really reflect, if I were to say what’s your McGuire family values, this would be the Maguire family values as well. I love how he, one of your core values isn’t a cling on or hold on to your painful past or any that you know, everything is pressive future. Futuristic is uh, you know, vision. You have faith forward. Love it. Love it. Shawn. So good. It’s funny, one of my core values is not to hold onto my destructive past. Yeah, that’s hilarious. Four guys are, we just want to say thank you and we’re going to close this Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast and we’re going to open up another Christian and premarital counseling in Edmond podcast and it will be the final one going over six and seven, six and seven. Really good. I’m excited and we are so thankful that you guys have come to join us. Yeah. If you could rate and review us on iTunes, it really helps to get the word out.
Sends a lot to us personally because we’re investing our Saturday mornings, sometimes, maybe Friday mornings. Come on now. It’s exciting. And then we’re creating this content really that is birthed out of the counseling office in our lives of how people’s lives change in Christ. And we’re sharing it with you guys so that you could take the message and practically apply it to your life in ways that change it and then affect the lives of others. So if there are those people that you know that could benefit from this man, great. And if you need more help for counseling, what can they do? They can hit you up, Sean. New Vision counseling.org now visit.live. [inaudible] no, I’m so used to saying that over the past year. I know you just started that.live here recently, man. We do a video on it too with some testimonies. Yeah. I’ll tell you what. Last Friday, not this previous one, but the Friday before we had seven of my clients come in, God, and they shared what God had done through counseling. And I’m like tearing up. My bucket is getting full of just hearing just that service of what I’ve really given my life to transform these people’s lives and just how God has touched each one of them.
Almost have me in tears when I was over here Wednesday night watching it on unity. Oh Man. It was a really good, a powerful, and, uh, just the last disclaimer I have for you guys. If you need prayer, if you need someone to walk alongside you in a few things you’re navigating through, hit me up on a text at six, seven, eight six six seven 65, 82. Woo. Oh guys, God bless. Remember real talk, real walk pocket. You guys have an amazing day and we will talk to you again. Really. All right. See you guys. God bless.