Hi everyone. Sean McGuire here, the vision zones, own marriage counselor Edmond, Caleb McKean. Hey, when you guys check in and let us know where you’re from, we love to engage and find out who’s listening and where you’re at. So today we have a really exciting topic. It’s how to overcome temptation and rise above. Rise above what. So why I left all of this question marks because we don’t know what we don’t know where you’re at. It could be sexual temptation, it could be the temptation to be bitter at somebody at work. It could be the temptation to cheat on your taxes. None of us ever have that temptation, right? But it could be a lot of things. So please listen through the lens of where you’re at in the circumstances in which you find yourself today. And we’re going to start out with just laying Caleb, share a little bit about how you help people since we both worked for new counseling, how you help people to overcome temptations and maybe some of in your own life, how you personally overcome temptation.
Yes, absolutely. Well, I’ve gone through a lot too in my own journey and one of the things that I’ve dealt with in the past was pornography. Before I was married, I dealt with pornography. Um, coming out of high school and this is one of the big key secrets working with men who’ve come through pornography or other addictions even. Uh, I’ve understood that we have to be aware of our surroundings, we have to see everything and know where we’re at. If we’re aware of our surroundings, then we’ll be able to divert any, um, any challenges around addiction that pull us or lure us in. So the first thing I like to do is be aware of the surroundings. For me that was, hey, is this spot affecting me more? Is this place where I seem to fall into temptation? Let me change the environment if I don’t go there at this time of day. So time of day is another big part of that surrounding. If I go there this time of day, often I just need to be aware that this is what the trigger is and that helps me divert it. Get into a new place. That’s good.
Yeah. They call that situational awareness. I know military strategist and knows that even in our local government fight terrorism, they say that you should always be situationally aware. Something’s out of order or something that has been a dangerous hotspot. Then you need to go into it with protection or you need to just avoid it altogether. That’s right. That’s really good. What else did you find helpful with overcoming temptation?
Replacing it, replacing those spots, those situations with something healthy. That’s a big piece about getting into a new habit I learned from my marriage counselor Edmond. So we can fight a habit for about 21 days. That’s old, but we have to replace it with something that’s new and something that’s healthy. And usually we can do that within 64 days. That’s really good. So something that is healthy can be what? What are some things that are healthy? You know, things that I look at a lot of time is um, healthy music, healthy scripture books. Um, you know, a few books, right? Yeah. What books would you recommend? You know, me and battlefield of the mind is really good by Joyce Meyers. There’s a book called for me, slight edge. It’s a book I’m reading right now. It really helps you to engage in the daily habits to become successful over the long haul. The Bible also has just thousands of tens of thousands of scriptures that you can wire it and instead of just being good words, it’s the living word. It’s, it’s wiring Christ into your DNA and I think that the more that you do that, over time, you’ll experience that there’s a difference fundamentally in the way that when you’re attempted before it was an overwhelming flood like a tidal wave at some points when you’re just coming out of a temptation or a sin. That’s right. It’s you been engaged in as you progress and move forward, it becomes a new native habit instead of being overwhelmed with sexual thoughts. When you look at pornography, when you start wiring and beauty, when you start wiring and treating women with honor and and writing pure notes and making, enforcing your imagination to imagine whatever is good, pure, loving Olin Praiseworthy Eckert, and if you really engage in our intentional, then you start to really experience transformation.
Physiologically you literally think and feel different, right? You all know this when, if you have a problem with road rage, when somebody cuts you off, you physiologically elevate your blood pressure goes up, your stress, right? I mean cortisol is released into your body and you just stressed out and turn on. It’s also true, like when you’re getting ready to go on vacation and you get there and you get on the beach and relax, ah, you know what to do because you’re at the place you want to be at. I’ve learned as a marriage counselor Edmond, that the same is true with wiring and good words, good books, good people, good thoughts. It physiologically, mentally, emotionally creates new triggers and new experiences in your life.
That’s absolutely right. Some of the things that we want to look at is, um, when we look at books and scripture is just make sure that they’re very positive. One book that I really tell a lot of people to look at his walking with God by John Eldridge. It’s just how to hear from God, how he speaks to us daily. Sometimes we may see him in nature, sometimes we may see him in situations. We just want to be aware of those things and we want to replace big thing there is replace what you were doing with something that is good and his new. If you’re constantly thinking about the negative things, you’re going to produce negativity. If you’re thinking about good things, you’re going to produce good things. I actually want to share a scripture with you. This is from uh, first John Chapter two verse 24.
What you have heard from the beginning must remain in you. If what you have heard from the beginning remains in you, then you will remain in the sun and in the father. And this is the promise that, uh, that he has for you eternal life. So if you are putting your thoughts on good holy things, as Sean was talking about and you’re walking with God, you’re not going to be tempted. You can’t hold both of those tensions in your mind. At the same time. If you find yourself being tempted, here’s the next, here’s another key. Yeah, be grateful. A grateful heart is more happy. The more you’re grateful for things and where you’re thankful of, the more you’re telling people. Thank you. I really enjoyed this. That language. It will change your mindset. It will change. You fizzle out just as you were speaking of.
No, it’s good. You know I’ve been a marriage counselor Edmond, and I think I personally didn’t know before I got married. You know, the thing was don’t have sex, don’t have sex, but it’s just so much focus on the negative. That’s right. We’re like, if you’re on a diet, don’t eat this. Don’t eat that. When you go out, don’t, don’t, don’t. Instead of focusing on, let’s say back to the diets really easy one focused on me and I want to look like Kayla’s McCain. I’m a big, big, big biceps. Be Strong. I want to have energy and instead of focusing on all the negatives, scrap that, um, focus on, he just dropped a check out of his pocket public for $1 million. Focus on the positives of why you’re saying to know because a really quick notice, something that is less than or or sinful, even if it’s not bad, even if it’s less than God’s best, really opens the door for a momentum to move into where God’s calling you to live, where God’s calling you to be. Who the man or woman God’s calling you to become. Yes, that is exactly right. We want to step into the calling of who God has for us and some of those things is just asking him, what do you have for my life? What do you want to do with me? And some of you have already asked that question. You’re saying, well, I still don’t have clarity. I still don’t have answers. I just want to speak to you right now. You can get clarity by being still and being present with him by just waiting on his hands, hers and sometimes the thing that God has most for you and most for your calling is just to be present with him, be present with your family, especially men. Be present with your family. Know that your children are there and you can be with them and help cultivate them and to growth into transformation. Also with your wife that you can create a canopy of covering that she would feel loved and then she can grow in beauty and that she can grow in her fullness of who God created her to be.
Hey man, that’s so good. You know there, there’s somebody lists from Oklahoma High Berkeley. It’s so good that you’re checking in. I know you can really use what we’re talking about today from our marriage counselor Edmond. So I think what we’re saying is the devil has really ravaged our world. He’s ravage, Manny’s ravage women. He’s destroyed families for so long, cause be he’s been able to from the garden of Eden till today, to get the focus off of God and God’s love and God’s provision and who got is in relationship to us loving father onto the fruit that which is now, you know, the, the, the really draws sin isn’t that it’s better. It’s that it’s, it’s right in front of us. It’s right now. You know, you think of the garden of Eden, it was the turtle. It was forever, but there is a now they had all this fruit, no headaches, no pain, nothing.
But it was the now of wow, this looks good to eat and how it’s coveting, which desirable to the eyes. And isn’t that all the temptations that we face? That’s right. If you look at Netflix, what’s the deal with Netflix? Well, I don’t know about you. I give out my very best all day and I, if I’m not careful and I don’t guard myself, I’ll have nothing left when I get home. And so thinking about this, I come home as is vacant tank. Who needs needs, needs, and I have a choice. Will I spend some time or will I trust God to fill those gaps? Leave space for a marriage counselor Edmond. Maybe you’re not seeing as many people or will I go home and fill up on Netflix and let whatever I put into my mind and my heart be that which I meditate on because God’s love never be deceived and that whatever you watch, whatever you engage in, whatever music you listened to, even if you don’t remember the words, there is always with no exceptions, a transaction.
There’s always a transaction. Rashawn Copeland knows this well that when you watch something, it’s an importation of whatever you’re watching wouldn’t even listen. It’s an impartation of whoever’s speaking or singing. They’re bestowing upon you that which they have to go and so. So make sure that your eyes, your ears are attuned to what you want as part of your life. So many of families are attempted without even being, being aware of it because maybe their kids in their room listen to something they don’t know about him. Or maybe the dad’s just sitting down eating dinner and he’s got the TV on, but he’s really kind of only halfway paying attention. But that’s just like letting somebody into your house that you’ve not vetted and made sure it’s safe and made sure has the right spirit and the right kind of personality that you want to give to your kids that you want to be around.
I know personally I’m really guarded about the people that I choose to spend time with. The people I serve are the people. Like I love it, you know, give out to, that can be a myriad of anybody really. But the people that I really let around my family and an intimate way, I’m really careful when it comes to women. I am super guarded and aware of my limitations and where that’s at for me. Not for you because yours may not work for me. Right. Mine works for me. And that’s part of the process of you guys growing and being a situationally aware of all the dimensions of your environment. Because think about this way, the negative is all Netflix can be bad or, or you know, Facebook can be awful. Or you can say, you know what? We’re going to watch the Bible series on Netflix together once a week. We’re to make that our family time
on Facebook. There’s these people, Caleb and Sean, they’re awesome. Or Sean and Rochelle chess. Yeah. You know, and we’re going to invest that because they imparted life to us, so we’re going to partner with them. So there’s so many ways that by focusing on the greatness that is around you and pushing out the lesser, your life will change. The temptations that may be overwhelming you today will decrease in their ability to seduce and overcome your stamina and your ability to say yes because you’re so full. Your tank is overflowing with the love of God through the experience of, look, look at it. We’re in a beautiful place, you know, and probably a month you look back here, it’s going to be all green and I, it’s going to be so exciting. I wouldn’t say I can’t wait, but man, it’s march. It’s just great. The weather’s beautiful.
Yeah. Fisher bindings. Right. So, so if I focused on those things from me, I get excited. I get excited about what I can do moving forward. And then all of this, Netflix and, and the areas I may be tempted in wasting time and they’re not as big of a deal. Yeah. Well, the things that I’m s I just want to kind of recap on his be situational aware. No, you’re surrounding cure him. Fire me. Especially when you find yourself doing things often that you don’t want to be doing. Be Aware of where you’re at. No. That time and place. Replace it with good things. Get out of that situation. I’m put it with, put it in context with good things. And then also, um, just bringing your mind into who you really want to become. Creating that space. Shawn’s talking about Netflix. My wife and I know that if we consume ourselves in our mind, if we consume certain things, that we will be consumed by them.
So if we consume certain things will be consumed by them. We take time to watch Todd white. We take time to watch Dan Molar on Youtube and we consume the teachings of God. That’s what we really want to be consumed by. And then we have times where it says in acts that you should, um, go that the believers, the church, first century church, they went from house to house every day worshiping God, praying. We’re getting into new communities that are involved with God, that are consumed with him. They’re thinking about what he’s doing, uh, that they’re putting their thoughts on things that are above where Jesus is seated at the right hand of the father. That’s very important. If you want to change what’s inside, you need to be consumed with what you want to be, what you want to change. As a marriage counselor Edmond, we want to be consumed with our hearts by God. And so that’s really what’s changing our hearts. Amen. That’s really good. You know, I know one of the areas for me that, um, if I’m not diligent on is I need to constantly be learning. I love, love, love, love. I think God wired us all to be just voracious about learning and growing. Like I say, you know, one of the other languages,
Gary Chapman, scissors five, I think they’re six, seven, maybe eight. I think humor is number six. I think the love of learning and feedback is number seven, maybe seven and eight. But I know that when I am learning, I am just more motivated. It’s like a caffeine. I feel more energized because I’m growing and I’m using what God gave me right to sleep. And I know where, what I learned, something that is helpful to me. I can love my family more effectively. I can serve the people in counseling more productive. And then I just feel this experience of growing the same is true. When I started to exercise more, you know, I go through seasons of eating really clean, eating semi clean, and, and when I’m eating a really clean, it really has an impact of how much I exercise. It doesn’t impact on my thought process.
And really when you start to do well in one area, there’s a current that goes up. That’s right. And you’re motivated to do better in other areas. And when you’re moving up, guess what happens to the people around you? They experienced this gravitational pull upwards and when you surround yourself, it’s like hot logs. You know you don’t have my son out here last night when you have all these hot logs together, man, they feed off of each other. But I said, watch this buddy. And I kicked him and they started going apart and they fizzled out really quick. And I said, that’s what happened son. Wherein you don’t surround yourself. People that are on fire for God is you can last for a little while but eventually you will slowly start to fizzle out. And so the, so much of this is true and it all goes back to not focusing on the temptation, but focusing on the cure, the value, Jesus Christ, all that he’s given us in friends, relationships and nature and people that teach friends that can be around and when we haven’t really talked about is what happens when you start to serve and give out of yourself.
That’s good and amazed society. Marriage counselor Edmond, what happens when you start to serve and give out? I know when I start to serve, I feel more alive. I feel that man look, all right. I was able to contribute to somebody else’s life. And if I’m able to contribute to somebody else’s life, I need to check is it about me? But oftentimes when I’m doing it for God, it’s not about me. And that’s not a hard question. A good question comes up that are they alive? Did they see you? Father, I just want them to see you. I just want to be excited about God being seen as a good father. And when I’m in that place, I’m just ready to go. And I love seeing people come fully alive knowing that the father loves them, that they have purpose, that they have every good thing in front of them.
And so, um, as we give out, we’re able to pour in to other people, the love of God and we’re filled up. Those who refresh, we’ll also be refreshed. And man, that’s cured. We’re guys, we thank you for tuning into us. We thank you that you were able to take part of your Saturday to partner with us. And Hey, we wanted to give a shout out to Rashawn Copeland. He just had a little baby. Even just Cya Copeland. Oh Wow. Congratulations for Sean. He was 14 pounds when he was born. 14 pounds. No, I’m just kidding. That’s how much is Denise place. The baby actually weighs seven pounds. Wow. Healthy, big bodacious head of hair. Beautiful Kid. Hey, if you want to get ahold of us, you can get ahold of us. Set New Vision Counseling Dot o r g and we love you to follow us on Facebook cause we put stuff on there and we tried to vast, every Tuesday we have a team meeting with the rest of the therapists were a lot of the therapists. And uh, you can go to Facebook nuvision counseling or follow us on Sean mcguire.net but we would love for you to tune in every time we get on and partner with us. So God bless. Reach out, activate now on what we talked about. Because within 24 hours, if you do, the likelihood of you going and being successful exponentially increases. Yes. Right. I request. And then we’ll see you soon.