WHAT EXACTLY IS GASLIGHTING?
Gaslighting is a type of psychological manipulation in which someone attempts to discredit your reality and make you doubt your own sensations in order to control you. This tactic is kept in the back pockets of narcissists and is frequently used to achieve what they desire and impose dominance over others. Controlling people who abuse their relationships emotionally are frequently guilty of this. If you’re in a relationship with someone who gaslights you, you’re probably feeling a lot of self-doubt and maybe questioning your identity. Gaslighting is a common method used to exert control over one person in a relationship, although it is not limited to romance. A manipulative individual could be a supervisor, a friend, or a family member. However, the closer you are to the individual who gaslights you, the more difficult it is to stand your position.
WHERE CAN I FIND OUT IF I’M BEING GASLIGHTED?
If you are in a relationship with someone who is gaslighting you, you may detect an imbalance of power after reading this blog. Despite evidence to the contrary, it may appear that this individual does nothing wrong and always has the upper hand. A gaslighting partner may distort your perception of reality and drive you to doubt yourself. They frequently engage in destructive or dismissive behavior and then fail to accept responsibility for their conduct. They refuse to validate your damaged feelings and can talk themselves out of any situation.Shifting responsibility onto others comes naturally to people who gaslight others. After all, you’re just making stuff up, right? Remember that the deeper their hooks sink in, the more you doubt your sanity. Manipulative people will make you feel isolated, inadequate, and insecure. Worse, when you eventually summon the confidence to confront them, they have an answer for everything.
PHRASES COMMONLY USED IN GASLIGHTING
You’re being very dramatic.
You’re just being paranoid.
You forced me to act this way, so why do you keep bringing it up?
You’re exaggerating the situation.
You can’t handle a joke.
You’re overly sensitive.
It wasn’t such a huge deal.
This is simply your own fear.
That never occurred.
HOW TO GET RID OF GASLIGHTING
Setting limits is the first step toward breaking away from manipulation. Recognize the person who is gaslighting you, but inform them that you have your own reality. You have the right to express yourself, and your experience is genuine. Keep a notebook of conversations and occurrences to help you stand firm in the truth of what happened rather than the manipulative spin of the gaslighter. This can help you feel more normal and gradually regain your self-confidence. You will be able to see through their lies once you start doing this. Here are some sentences you can use to break their power over you. Most gaslighters will try to push past any boundaries you set, so be prepared to enforce them. Depending on the degree of the gaslighting, you might create a vocal boundary and other times you might simply leave the scene. These are only a few things to think about or say.
I don’t feel like I’m being heard, therefore I’m going to take a vacation from this debate.
You do not have to agree with me since I know how I feel.
I am free to have my own feelings, and I will leave if you continue to tell me that my feelings are incorrect or that I do not understand.
My experiences and opinions are valid, I understand, but my experience was different, and I will hang up if you continue to speak to me in this manner.
I’m done with this conversation until you’re ready to examine my points of view.
ARE YOU UNSURE WHAT TO DO? WE CAN ASSIST!
If you need assistance regaining your confidence, we are here to help. Knowing you’re being abused mentally and breaking away are two whole different things. We understand how frightening it can be to confront someone who has been gaslighting you. This is where we provide you the tools you need to build healthy boundaries both internally and externally with the other person. A person who employs gaslighting to achieve their goals may never respect your opinions, but they don’t have to. One method to begin breaking away from their influence is to ask for space or inform them that you will talk when they can be reasonable and courteous.
At New Vision Counseling and Consulting, we will give you the confidence to leave settings that no longer serve you (also known as gaslighting). We are pleased for the opportunity to accompany you on your journey and empower you to go beyond simply surviving to living a life you love. We look forward to hearing from you and are delighted to tailor your therapy experience to your specific needs! You can begin right away by dialing (405) 921-7776 for additional information.